A few months ago I had what I thought was supposed to be a ‘BIG’ birthday. The grand vision I had for celebrating myself and saying goodbye to an entire decade of discovery and welcoming a new one did not go according to that plan I had carefully constructed and crafted in my head. Which I think is almost a beautifully powerful and symbolic representation of everything I have learned up until now. So let’s dive deep…some of these are juicy!!
1. Alcohol is not really the fun Partayyy it is cracked up to be, and is best in small doses.
Also…the more you drink…the more you will eat ..trust me..it just happens and somehow you find yourself eating that 3am kebab in an attempt to soak up the nights beverage intake… while walking barefoot back to the train station or stumbling into an Uber (and feel bloated and bleh the next day).
Hangovers are not CUTE!… But if you are hungover get up and go for a run or swim….get a good fresh juice into you…paired with some bacon and eggs and a hash brown. Get your nutrients up but sometimes some grease is necessary to pull it together the morning after a big night.
2. Push yourself to get outside of your comfort zone
Growth doesn’t happen within the realm of comfort.
3. Health is wealth
Invest in your health…holistic and natural. YOUR BODY IS A TEMPLE- WORSHIP ITS MAGIC AND maintain it. Prioritise money in your budget on good wholesome food, your gym membership AND…Always budget more for your weekly food shop than you think!
4. Your social circle/network will dwindle the older you get and that’s ok.
5. All friends are not necessarily true friends.
Cultivate the circle that is the most powerful and uplifting. No time for toxicity, negativity or drama. It’s ok for a friendship to end or for you to feel like you have outgrown it. It has been said that people come into your life for either a reason, a season or lifetime. Sometimes it us hard to know which is which but as you move through life this will become more apparent to you.
6. NEVER ever ask a woman if she is pregnant, wants to be pregnant, is going to have kids etc.
This is of course standard because you don’t want to come across as rude but also you don’t want to trigger that woman if she is struggling with infertility, has healed from an eating disorder, has experienced abuse or has a health condition that could impact conception. Just leave it as a no go topic, unless someone wants to bring up that topic…and be a kind ear to listen and love.
7. You don’t have to be on the same path you thought you would be at 18 when you left school.
Dreams, desires and circumstances change. Other doors will become open. Other roads will appear. Chose the one that fits you best. I took a gap year mid degree. Sometimes new roads will find you and be begging you to drive down them.
8.. Life is too short not to take the risk. TAKE THE DANG RISK! WE ONLY REGRET THE CHANCES we didn’t take.
What ifs are the most toxic thing to live with. Far worse than the outcome if you just took that risk in the first place. What do you have to lose…and hey…what if it turns out?!
9. You will never EVER regret getting on that plane.
TRAVEL! as much as your bank account will allow. It will open your whole world up…make you more open hearted and minded, a better problem solver and someone with more compassion. It is also a great way to expand your circle and meet great people. I have met some amazing lifelong friends because I got on the plane.
10. As each year passes you become a different version of yourself (you get to decide whether this is good different or bad different).
Allow the layers to shed and welcome the pruning that experiences will give you. Whatever happens now is setting you up for what is to come.
11. Money will come and go…but it’s the people around you that matter the most.
Invest in your relationships. Esther Perel says it so beautifully “It is the quality of our relationships that determines the quality of our lives”.
12. Diversify your wealth and income- up your INVESTMENT GAME.
This is smart to set things up for your future but is also super attractive…What guy wouldn’t be impressed by a woman who has her Sh#! together and can talk about investing and stocks. If you are totally lost…buy a few books..dig into some podcasts and start small.
13. Establish a healthy morning and evening routine
This is a game changer. Part of this= Get out in nature every day…calming, healthy, liberating and freeing.
14. Never lose sight of the inner child within you.
Don’t ever stop playing. See people and the world for the good they can have, not the bad. Run and slide under the sprinkler…let yourself have pancakes or ice cream for dinner every now and then. What a ripper of an idea that is! Sorry Mum! LOL!
15. Be willing to accept when things are not what they used to be and be willing to make the changes necessary…
We each create our OWN reality and have our truth.
16. You can grieve and grow at the same time
And your twenties will be FILLED with many opportunities for both.
17. People CAN and WILL let you down.
Sometimes to the people you love and care about the most….Do NOT accept anything less than you deserve. Do NOT settle for the leftover breadcrumbs when you deserve the WHOLE DAMN CAKE…..be brave enough to walk away when you are not being respected and valued no matter how much you love them or how much ‘potential’ you see in them…if they do nothing with the potential- RUN! Actions speak louder than words. Don’t try to heal or fix them. That is not your job, it’s their responsibility – AND You won’t always get closure..no matter how much you deserve it or how much you think you need it. SAY THAT AGAIN…for anyone in the back!!!
18. Boys take FOREVER TO ACTUALLY become MEN! and they need help with this.
Let them know that by being vulnerable with you..this is a safe space for them/that. However, in the same token it is essential that men are taking accountability and responsibility for their own life, actions, behaviour and growth. That they step up and seek help and guidance when they need it, in order to become the best version of themselves that they can be. Encourage this.
19. Better to go it alone than just to have someone there to stop you feeling lonely because you will end up feeling MORE alone than ever that way.
In the same token……Better to have loved and lost than avoided in the fear of getting hurt.
20. Divine feminine and divine masculine.
Everyone carries an energy about them…raise your frequency … your vibe attracts your tribe. Don’t hide your gifts from the world. We all have elements of masculine and feminine energy within us and it takes time, radical self awareness and commitment to get that dance or balance right. As a woman I am always checking in with myself to make sure I am fully embodying my divine feminine characteristics as I know how much of a powerful difference it makes to all my relationships with everyone around me.
21. Always be kind for you have no idea what someone is dealing with behind closed doors ….
at the same time ——- Advice: unless someone asks for it don’t give it. Ask permission to give feedback and speak into someone’s situations and experiences in order for them to be able to fully receive and for your intentions to remain pure…and everyone’s nervous system can remain calm.
22. Time is your most precious commodity.
You can always make more money but you can not make more time. And do whatever it takes to buy it back so it does not get drained by things and people. Time is an excuse..you will always make time for what and WHO you prioritise.
23. Back yourself. Especially when NO ONE else does.
The only one who will truly look out for you and your career is YOU. YES, Loyalty is important ..but sometimes the cost of this is too great. Go where you are going to be valued, you are going to grow, to be happy. Sometimes you are all you’ve got.
24. You can have roots AND wings. You get to live a life of both…not either/or.
I love this phrase so much, not just because I love the movie ‘Sweet Home Alabama’ but also because I think it is so powerful and resonates with me so deeply. You CAN have stability and plant yourself somewhere AS WELL AS going far and wide to chase your dreams.
25. Don’t change yourself, your values, beliefs, non negotibles and things you are not comfortable with to get someone else to like you, approve of you, praise you, accept you, ‘love’ you etc.
Better to go against the grain than be a sheep just to ‘fit in’ with a mediocre crowd.
26. If it does not serve you and is not in alignment with your highest contribution to the world and it is not an ABSOLUTE YES….then it’s a HELL NO!
27. Life is messy
Ride the wave..go along for the ride. Jump off whenever you want to and jump back on when you feel led to do so.
28. Don’t compare your life and seasons to others..run YOUR own race.
Stay in your own lane. At times, I have thought about people I know getting married, having babies and buying houses and feeling ‘behind’ or like I am are not adulting….like I am somehow a fake adult. It’s ok to feel like a hot mess…that the way we grow and become the best version of ourselves we can be…and this will have a positive impact on others later on.
29. If your dreams don’t scare you …they aren’t big enough
30. FORGIVE yourself for the mistakes that you have made and the people you may have unintentionally hurt.
Everything happens for a reason. Situations and people are either a lesson, a blessing or sometimes both. None of us are perfect, we do our best with the tools that we have available to us at the time. Always be willing to learn, grow and develop YOU, in order to be the best version of yourself you can be.
Which one really hits home for you? Do you have any awesome major life lessons that you swear by? Drop them down below, I’d love to hear them 🙂
The fact that you included the “be kind” statement! Considering that was the last thing you said to me, it hits every time i see it written somewhere.
Oh wow! I’m so glad you resonate with that. It really is such a simple idea but so powerful at the same time! I hope your 2022 has been everything you hoped and that things at school are going really well 🙂